Attempts to resolve the Quandary:
6
Inspired by the sprightly Maxixe of Augustin Barrios, young R. took up the classical guitar, vowing to practice for the rest of his life, until his final trip on the bier, but he could only study by moonlight because the neighbors were a family of heliolatrous trombonists, constantly honking at the sun in a cacophonous machination to win celestial favor for brass instruments.
(by Rudi)
5
Buford Bethune may have been a buffoon but he was a very lucky embezzler who made his way to the heliolatrous, and extradition free, shores of Brazil before I found him ineptly practicing ungainly lascivious acts and a similarly lewd version of the maxixe with nubile young women who, with only the most rudimentary of machinations, bamboozled the bumbler out of all of his ill-gotten fortune in such record time that he died with just enough left for a brief service around a makeshift bier and a smile that apparently no mortician could remove. (by gumo420)
4
It is not clear whether Krishna pulled this particular machination off through his own Maya, or heliolatry, or if he masterfully used a solar eclipse to his advantage, but as Jayadrata, whom Arjuna had sworn he would kill before sunset, for mercilessly murdering the valiant young Abhimanyu, came out of his hiding when the Sun disappeared, it reappeared, and Arjuna's fatal shot carried Jayadrata to his bier, as young Abhimanyu danced the maxixe in the halls of Valhalla. (by QuaQua)
3
Tra la la la la la la la / La! / You should see me dance the maxixe / In the braw Brazilian sun / As I prance on the bier / Of my ancestor drear / And machinate heliolatrous fun! (by Bud Myte)
2
Mrs. Kilbourne, a lifelong sun-worshiper, moved to Mexico following her divorce, not only to indulge her heliolatry and to find someone to teach her to dance the maxixe, but also to escape the ruthless machinations of her ex-husband, who would never stop scheming to reduce the alimony he paid her until he was stretched out dead on his bier, lying in state in the mahogany-paneled lobby of Kilbourne, Kilbourne and Kilbourne, Mergers and Acquisitions Division. (by cusheamus)
1
Winthrop, whose obsessive heliolatry spurred by his dermatologist wife's machinations, was now in his bier and left to the keening of his friends, while his aforementioned spouse was doing the naughty maxixe in the couple's bed, still somewhat warm from poor Winthrop's terminal tremors. (by tree)
7
The Wanenei tribe, who practice a form of heliolatry, have delightfully elaborate funerals: to defeat the machinations of the gods of Darkness and insure eternal Light to the dead, they distract the gods by dancing the maxixe, while quietly loading the bier into a rocket which they shoot directly into the sun. (by roch)