Attempts to resolve the Quandary:
5
4
Before he stepped out into the London rain, my boss the stockbroker opened his bumbershoot and, looking pensive, said to me, "Occupy the City has me worried, my boy, and I fear the rule of the mobocracy has drawn nigh -- but you're not even paying attention, you lummox, so just open the door for me and wish me good day."
(by ohelbok)3
Alas, the time of mobocartic rule lies in the past, and the lone lummox leading now has banned all bumbershoots, even as the rains draw nigh!
(by BitRoyal)
6
In this chapter, Hagrid the loyal hirsute lummox, armed with his magical bumbershoot, will lumber into the fray against the nigh mobocracy of the Death Eaters, the followers of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.
(by wordgirl)