Bubba found ROTC at an Ivy League college to be quite different from his southern small town high school; he missed the roaring rants and felt like he needed a dictionary when his sergeant calmly rebuked them by saying, “If I upbraid you it’s only because I don’t want one of my men – or women, to be preantepenultimate or lower at graduation, to zombie out in the lecture hall instead of staying alert, or to remit in his, or her, studies -- so, no slackers in my unit, only motivated, successful cadets.”

After accumulating a meagerly peppered batting record for the 4th season in a row, upbraiding the umpires in a league match for a human-error based wrong decision and zombying out on drugs during his suspension, child prodigy Jack Justforkicks, however, a true Yorkshire pinch hitting talent, was remited and he sat on the bench as the preantepenultimate choice amidst a long list of possible substitutes.

When Mr. Smetnick upbraided me for zombieing out in class, I assured him it was the preantepenultimate time it would happen--whereupon he lapsed into an embarrassed silence, unwilling to admit that he didn't know what the word meant; and he remitted his criticism, and receded into confusion at his desk, squirming and writhing and contorting his body into various shapes (including that of a fudge-covered pretzel); and wolves howled at the edge of the forest, and banshees wailed in the moonlight.