During Oktoberfest in the Bavarian Village, it was absolutely essential that the compère become a sansculotte for protocol and policy, and while salutary food choices might not be important, anglicisms were strictly banned, and although most visitors did not realize that the venue advertising “Wienerschnitzel” was not selling hot dogs, “Biergarten” was close enough to English for people to understand – and enjoy.

Having helped himself to a backstage cordial (for its salutary effects, of course) the compère of the French variety show lost his typical restraint and allowed anglicisms like “cool” and “le bodybuilding” and even “une sex bomb” to slip into his speech, thereby losing favor with those linguistic sansculottes in his audience who were waging a war against all foreign intrusions into their language.

“Come my friends, come to my MacChâteau in Sudhampton, it will be a salutary relaxation for all of us”, our compère spoke with his usual awful anglicisms, but we were dismayed to find upon arrival that he lorded over a nudist colony which he had naughtily christened Sans-Culottes, the name given to some French revolutionaries.