Quadrivial Quandary:  Logophiles, Rejoice!  Each day we give you four unusual words.  Can you fit them all in one illustrative sentence?

Attempts to resolve the Quandary:

2

The three friends were back in their favourite Diner, in Washington – but still under the jurisdiction of President Dewey Trumpet-Trousers because of that strange quirk of fate that united New York and DC as the Republic of New Columbia when the USofA was dissolved a few years ago – and Lulu Finckelmann was delighted to see them: "coffee and?" she enquired and before any of them could reply she yelled over her shoulder to Lola Goldstein in the kitchen: "the Coffee Klatch is back, double cake all round already!" – and grinned at them; Hyman Z Kaplan and his two best friends, Sadie Moskowitz and Rose Mitnick, collaborators, investigative reporters and, on occasion deadly rivals when one got a scoop he, or she, knew was best suited for the handful of publications each wrote for individually; while they waited, Hyman told them the latest piece of information he had picked up, from a contact in the Bronx: "the DA's gone AWOL – totally missing like she vanished in the night and they don't have a clue where she is!" and Sadie stared at him: "which means you do, have a clue?" and Hyman lowered his head, not that he was afraid of being heard over the kletzmer blaring from the kitchen, while Lola worked to it's frenetic rhythm: "a friend of mine, no really, an old family friend, is in Nova Scotia checking out some family history stuff – I think he's become a maginoperator, gonna write the definitive Family History of the McLeods; his family's Scottish," Rose interjected, "as in Jewish or like you might say a basketball player is fairish?" and Kaplan grinned: "definitely as in Jewish, his family name is McLeod, I think they come from Skye and the difference from Jewish is it passes down the male line; some ancestor came over after the Bonnie Prince Charlie fiasco and probably made his way up from New England sometime and settled in Nova Scotia, or whatever it was called back then; probably Mi'kma'ki after the Mi'kma'k people, who actually sound like some Scottish name too, but then the French conquered it and it was a while later the Brits defeated them in the Napoleonic War – maybe that was the real First World War; anyway he lived in our block when I was a kid, ha ha, I was the Yid Kid and he was the Goy Kid obviously, and there was a Wop Kid and a Dago Kid . . . . ." and both Rose and Sadie looked angry, "is that what people called you? – OMG little kids being tagged by their ethnicity . . . . ." but Hyman tried to calm them, "yeah, if anything – nobody bothered about a kid's real name, they called us whatever they felt like calling us, sometimes it was just 'Hey Kid' or 'Hey Ratface', or 'Hey You!' which was kinda the worst thing, cause it usually meant trouble, but that was way back when New York was EthniCity like you said, Sadie, hey, you remember the Jewish Bocks and the Irish Blocks, and the Little Italy and Harlem, and then the Hispanics came in and it was like vegetable soup but with the separate vegetables floating in the stock, now they're mashed and mixed up or if they're poor the got shoved into the shanties out of sight like it used to be in Buenos Aires or South Africa, but people do still like to gravitate to and hangout with people like themselves: and not just racial – remember when we used to hang out in Greenwich Village? all the Jazz and Folk joints and Left Wing Bookshops, and Feminist Cafés? we hung around people we felt comfortable with, wrote pieces for the Voice for nothing, just to get into print, and when we got work on magazines and newspapers, did you work for a publisher whose politics or philosophy you detested?" and both his friends shook their heads, getting his point; he continued with the story: "anyway, enough of the Old Golden Days of Yore, Callum, my friend, has been shuttling about Nova Scotia and a couple of days ago and he heard about a trucking depot, Doubleday Trucking which had taken over an old haulage company an ancestor of his is thought to have worked for in the 1880s, McAlpine Freight, it seems the County Archivist had been sifting out old documents going back 200 years and she arranged to meet Callum, at the Depot," and Sadie asked: "you did say Doubleday Trucking, is that as in our Doubleday?" and Hyman nodded, "yepp, registered in Portland, Ohio, but anyway, Callum went to the Depot and was sitting by a window in an upstairs room, where they keep all their records, and the Archivist was showing him what she'd found, when a huge truck came in and was met by a group of guys who’d been hanging around in the yard; it offloaded a bunch of kids, all ages, ethnicities, both genders, and they were led in ones and twos to the guys cars, which drove away, and then Callum noticed two women, looked like Truck Stop Whores – his words – and he was sure he recognised one as Crystal Shann-Delleer, Bronx DA!" and after a moment's stunned silence, the girls spoke at the same time: "how?" "does he know her?" "is he positive?" "dressed like a whore?" and Hyman waited till they paused for breath, then said: "he recognised her because he's the Senior Stenographer at the Bronx Courthouse, which means he's in charge of all the written, audio and visual recording in all the courts and works closely with the DA's office and has known Ms Shann-Delleer since she first joined as an Assistant DA and in fact before that when she was a defence attorney, he is absolutely positive, but then he saw an old guy in a kilt outfit usher the two women into an SUV and drive off with them; the Archivist saw that too and she was able to identify the guy in the kilt as the Estate Manager for the biggest private estate on Prince Edward island, which belongs – the Estate, not the Island, to Sir Parlane MacFarlane Imperial Grand Chief or whatever the head honcho of a Clan is, who is currently guest of the Bronx Department of Corrections awaiting arraignment on charges relating to crimes going back 20 or more years!" which was when they saw the popinjay, emerge from a pink driverless Uber that had just drawn up to the curb, and look around then directly at the diner, indeed, directly at them! and Rose turned to Sadie and asked "is that Roland?" and Sadie nodded, "I'd give you Roland for a Yid Kid any day, but unfortunately, he's what we got!"

(by MissTeriWoman)

1

Sir Toby was a popinjay,
And Roland was his jest;
Sir Toby would magnoperate,
While Roland did his best.
But Toby was, if anything,
A liar and a fraud
Who ended up a pauper
While Roland swept the board!
(by OldRawgabbit)
The Quandary for Sunday, January 28, 2018 consisted of: Challenge: use all four words together in one illustrative sentence.

Since September 2009, word lovers have offered 7150 sentences — each one a surprise — to QQ's unique and growing library. Explore other Quandaries through our word list or the calendar below. View yesterday's QQ resolutions or pick a day at random.

Definitions:

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