Buford Bethune may have been a buffoon but he was a very lucky embezzler who made his way to the heliolatrous, and extradition free, shores of Brazil before I found him ineptly practicing ungainly lascivious acts and a similarly lewd version of the maxixe with nubile young women who, with only the most rudimentary of machinations, bamboozled the bumbler out of all of his ill-gotten fortune in such record time that he died with just enough left for a brief service around a makeshift bier and a smile that apparently no mortician could remove.