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Quandary Resolution 8028
filiation, tajine, phalanx, maze, adj.

And that was how it so happened, that come Monday Morning, pretty damn near all the Ponty and Llareggub folk living in the warmer climes of Jerusalem and it's leafy environs, arriving as a phalanx to do battle and came to be crowded into the Courthouse for the Civil Compensation Case against Mr Clive Morgan, AKA the Ponty Pilot, for stranding them all in the Middle East as a result of his failure to adequately maintain his aircraft according to the safety standards contained in the Magic Carpets (and other forms of flight) Regulations Act in which "it is clearly stated," said their lawyer, Aladdin Lewis, a filiated partner in the firm of Lewis, Lewis, Lewis, Lewis, Lewis Lloyd-George & Lewis, Solicitors and Estate Agents, originally of Town Hall Street, Pontypridd and now of Lewis Chambers, Courthouse Lane, Jerusalem, "that failure to mend any holes, frayings or other faults caused by age, moths or any other reason, likely to render it unable to complete the return journey for such social, business or any other purposes, paid in advance by it's passengers, must," and he stretched that word out to five, or possibly six, syllables, if you count the sharp intake of breath between the last two, and then let it float on the smoky air of Court 6, sweltering under the watchful eye of the Praetorian Prefect, Clive Morgan OBOE (he played the Lead Oboe part in the Pontypridd and Lower Jerusalem Brass Band) "accept responsibility for their return journey, failing which. . . . ." and here Mr Morgan, excused himself from the Bench, quickly moved to the Dock where, representing himself, as Defendant, shouted: "objection!" and then returning to the Bench, in his measured tones – as befits the Roman Governor of the Province – said: "sustained; Mr Lewis, you must restrain yourself from Judgements, those are my responsibility," and Mr Lewis paused, to rephrase his remarks: "ought perhaps to consider himself responsible for fulfilling his part of the contract by providing transport to return his passengers to their eventual destination, that is, to the place where their journey began," and sat down to cheers from the public benches, at which the Governor banged his gavel on the table and cried: "order, order in Court – I will not permit any such excesses in this Courtroom and if there are any further egregious displays of emotion will have no alternative but to declare you all In Contempt and order the Bailiff to clear the Court," and in the silence which followed, the Governor – who could have heard a pin drop -smiled and said: "Mr Lewis, I will hear submissions in my Chamber," the Bailiff, Taffy Thomas, formerly of Gas Works Lane, Pontypridd, bawled: "all rise," and after the Governor and Mr Lewis had disappeared into the Governor's Chamber, where a savoury tajine if Lamb and Cous-cous awaited, the Bailiff and his Assistant cleared the Court and resumed their game of draughts; outside, the passengers, quite mazed by the morning's proceedings, gathered into huddled groups, discussed the chances of their case and the rumours which had been circulating all weekend, that the Ponty Pilot was having his plane repaired and there might be a chance of going home; but not all were happy about this – gey few in fact – as they had been in Jerusalem for some years now, and most had rather happily settled into their new lives: "it's all that Lewis chap's fault, cajoling us into this, with his legal mumbo-jumbo," said Winston Smith, former Town Clerk of Pontypridd, "me and Doris are happy here, we don't want to go back, the kids are settled into school and all," and Bob the Bike, who had set up a new business, similar to the ailing one he had left behind, and was now the foremost supplier of bicycles in the whole of Greater Jerusalem, agreed: "we've all got a better life here, it's too wet in Ponty, I don't want to go back, neither," which was the prevailing sentiment among the Claimants, who had only agreed to join the Claim in the hope of getting some financial compensation, not a return flight.

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